26 feb 2011 - divagaciones

*Un dia caminando por la vida me pregunte si acaso era posible ordenar mi mente, balancear mi vida, y vivir con un poco de disciplina. El gran logro de mi adolescencia fue revelarme contra las sandeces que me enseñaron y vivir como yo queria vivir; pero ahora esa misma rebeldia se volvia en contra mia: no respeto ni los tiempos que me asigno yo mismo.
Y asi me pregunté qué hacer con mi caos patologico y mi incapacidad de comprometerme con nada... siempre, siempre había querido perder el control y entregarme, como quien se arroja al mar, al suenho de mi vida.


....Pero entonces, como una epifanía, surgió la pregunta:
¿Cómo voy a perder el control si no lo tengo?
*Nunca ha hecho tanto impacto en mi psique una frase sabia como la de aquella vez, de mi profesor de historia, "No se puede dar, lo que no se tiene". Esta no era mejor, pero me transportó directo a ese momento, era lo mismo, dicho de otra forma. Era lógico. Rechazar mis desesperados intentos por el orden era ilógico y absurdo hasta para mi instito. Al fin y al cabo, si quería lanzarme al mar, y olvidarlo todo, y romper toda cadena, cuando el momento llegara, ¿qué voy a olvidar y qué voy a romper?; se necesita luz para realzar la oscuridad.
Necesitaba disciplina para valorar la libertad.
Bueno... así cayó uno de los tantos muros que habían entre mí y yo lo que quería hacer de mi propio destino, quedan muchas cosas por superar.
*Hablando de caos, siempre he tenido 2 modos, el modo "no pienso en nada más que una cosa y acabo como un ermitaño", y el "pienso en todo al mismo tiempo y acabo enloquecido"... tanta locura. Pero he encontrado el balance, hay que dejar caer las piezas, que se ordenen solas... dejar que fluyan las ideas, las preocupaciones, los compromisos, los sueños, las angustias, los miedos...
*deja resbalar los miedos (que no sirven para nada), y las ideas... había que tomarlas una por una.
*Una idea a la vez.
Esa fue mi última epifanía.


*-----ahí tienes algo     :>   fin.


Todo empezó así...

ERH89 dice:
*Entonces entiendo que estás buscando algo entretenido para hacer el siguiente post de tu blog
*¿O no?
cuarzoliquido (E-mail Address Not Verified) dice:
*Eso mismo
*Ingenioso, legible, didáctico, liviano
ERH89 dice:
*Perfecto, entonces, deja, te compilo un párrafo...
cuarzoliquido(E-mail Address Not Verified) dice:
*Excelente

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